So, picture this - you're in your 40s, you have four sons and life is "beautiful chaos". Then, one day, you decide you're finally going to write 'that' book. You know, the book you always knew you had in you, the one that's been bubbling up inside for decades? The one you gave up on after you had your kids and life switched into autopilot, the one that seems more out of reach now than it ever was before? And then...somehow, in-between school drop-offs, soccer lessons and more washing than a Chinese laundry, you actually finish it, score a book deal, it races up the charts, and you bag another 3 to create a 'series', and you're suddenly fielding offers for a movie...
Welcome to the life of Ingrid J. Adams!
If you're ever lucky enough to meet debut author Ingrid J. Adams in the flesh, you can't help but be lassoed into the energy forcefield she magically creates whilst she speaks. Talking at a million miles an hour, Ingrid never skips a beat, or the opportunity to not just paint a picture, but to extrapolate into granular detail in countless fine layers. She effortlessly weaves a palpable story like a colourful tapestry, expertly looping in and out of genuinely interesting tales, anecdotes and disarmingly goofy real-life adventures that leave you giddy, and somehow feeling blessed to have captured her attention enough to share even a minute of her time with you. Little wonder then she has a knack for writing.
"I’ve always been a super dramatic person with a vivid imagination" Ingrid confesses.
"Imagining improbable worst-case scenarios has always been my forte. I was always good at English and my favourite class in school was creative writing. I loved the challenge of writing something new and surprising, of adding a twist to the tale that no one saw coming. I had big dreams of becoming a writer but they seemed so very big. In fact it seemed so huge and untouchable and improbable it remained a pipe dream for decades". And yet here she is. With her first book DESCENDED down, and three to go.
"I’ve always wanted to write a book," she said.
"I have a box full of floppy discs containing parts of manuscripts too big to fit on one (ah the good old days of the tiny-memoried floppy disc!), and a secret stash of printed manuscripts I tried to get published in my twenties but got rejected.
"Looking back at those manuscripts, the concepts were pretty good, but the execution was pretty poor. I had no idea what I was doing. Let’s just say the publishers who rejected my work were right in doing so and I thank them for doing me a service.
"Back then the time wasn’t right, I wasn’t mature enough and I didn’t have enough to say. But I believe nothing ever goes to waste and there’s a few good bones in the carcasses of those manuscripts I hope to one day scrape off, revive, rework, you know, breathe a bit of new life into".
So, what was the catalyst to finally put pen to paper? "Five years ago, the youngest of my four boys went to preschool two days a week, and I can tell you I cried for days. I’d been a full time mum for well over a decade by then, and it felt like that chapter of my life was coming to an end. And I love being a Mum!", Ingrid said.
"Before I had my kids, I was practicing as a therapist (kinesiologist/nutritionist/psychotherapist), and I realised two days a week wasn’t enough to re-open my practice, nor was I able to give as much of myself as would be required to go back to delve into the healing of others. It was my husband who suggested that these two days a week were the perfect time to start writing that book I’d always wanted to write.
"It's been a long slog, and the manuscript I first drafted is a very different animal to the book I ended up publishing, and I have all the editors and mentors I worked with to thank for that. I’m very proud of the finished product that is DESCENDED, and the message within".
So now for the elephant in the room, (or maybe four)... How on earth do you write a book when you have four boys?
"It’s a really beautiful kind of chaos!", she laughs.
"People often ask me how I manage, but you know what? I honestly don’t know any different. This is just our life.
"It’s funny, because I’m the girliest girl you could ever meet. I don’t like bad smells or bodily fluids or sports or mess or dirt, but this is my lot in life, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. It’s always loud and messy and rumbly and hectic around here, and yes, our life does tend to be a real-life version of Malcolm In The Middle, but I love it.
"I was always desperate for a daughter. I’m incredibly close to my mum and I wanted a daughter to emulate that with. But it wasn’t to be. And I won’t lie, I did go through a period of mourning for the daughter I never had. But I got over it pretty quickly, because I wouldn’t swap any of my boys for all the girls in the world, and I am so blessed to be mother to these four beautiful souls. They’re all so different and unique, I’ve come to realise it’s not about the gender, it’s about the person, and I would die for these little people".
Aside from her intense parental journey, Ingrid's health has further played a pivotal role in her embracing the connection in mind-over-matter, personal growth and spirituality, all of which impact her first literary work.
"When I was in my early twenties, I got really sick. I was diagnosed with an ‘incurable’ autoimmune disease I was told I would never recover from. A disease I was told would steal my quality of life, my ability to have children and hold down a job or leave the house even. A disease they said would kill me in the end. A disease that took me to a very dark, very hopeless place", she said.
"At the time, I believed this was the worst thing that had ever happened to me, until I understood it was one of the best things that had ever happened to me. When faced with the reality that your body has let you down, and that none of the doctors, professors, or experts out there can help you, cure you, save you, it’s amazing how open minded you become, and how willing you are to look outside the square of your own reality.
My desperation to live a full life, to heal myself, launched me on a journey of discovery, a most wondrous, magical, eye opening journey which would not only save my life, but would change it forever. I am well now. Completely, utterly, 100% healthy. It turns out my incurable death sentence was in fact curable. I just had to look in all the right places and find the right people to help me"
Accepting her road less travelled is to be surrounded by young men, Ingrid further submitted to the theme by embracing the impetus of her daily life with DESCENDED's main character, a teenage boy in turmoil named Indigo, a young man in the 1990s navigating his relationship (or lack thereof) with his parents, his first love, his big emotions and the after-life - and in true Ingrid style, the story culminates into an magnificently unforeseeable end-twist.
"When I started planning this book I envisioned the main character would be a young girl, but the universe had other plans. I have spent the last fourteen years of my life creating boys - it turns out that that is where my strengths lay!", Ingrid laughed.
"As I began to write, it turned out the main character was in fact a young man, a young man who was as put together on the outside as he was broken on the inside. A young man who shows incredible strength through showing his vulnerability, his pain, his weaknesses. A young man who embarks on an extraordinary journey of discovery, who with the help of the remarkable people who come into his life is able to find his place in the world, demystify the universe, and figure out why he’s here .
"I think to find your place is the hardest thing to do as a child. We’re so worried about standing out, and what everyone else is thinking of us, and being picked on for being different… We hide our light to conform to the crowd."
With DESCENDED tackling themes of spirituality and posing 'out there' esoteric questions and possibilities, I asked Ingrid her personal motivations in their inclusions.
"DESCENDED definitely isn’t for everyone, but it was never meant to be. I wrote it for a specific audience. And that’s people like me, in all my different iterations, from that lost rudderless depressed and anxious teen I was, to the awakened woman of substance I am now… and literally everyone I was between then and now. So really, it’s for anyone who’s open-minded, curious, and searching for something more", she said.
So, what's "more?". Is there more to this life? Is there life after life?
"There is more to us and to this world than the physical," Ingrid said.
"I like to believe magic does exist. Maybe not on the Harry Potter level we’d like it to, but in the serendipitous way the universe works, in that we’re exactly where we’re meant to be, doing exactly what we’re meant to be doing at any given moment. No matter how broken we may seem, there is a way to put ourselves back together. There will always be people out there who care, who love us for the glorious mess we are. We just need to find our tribe".
"Only those who are different will make a difference to the world. So embrace your inner-weirdo and you will find your path and your true tribe".
Writing in my little study overlooking the park our house backs onto is when I’m totally in my element and thriving on a soul level.
Top Four: Shelly Beach (Cabbage Tree Bay Aquatic Reserve), Pearl Beach, Vomo Island in Fiji, and The Pass Byron Bay.
The magic of this little desert hamlet is palpable. It is one of the most stunningly breathtaking places I’ve ever been and whenever I’m there I just feel so happy and settled, it’s like coming home on an ancestral level.
Bon Jovi - the greatest poet in the world in my humble opinion. The lyrics of their songs are so beautiful and so deep. I’ve always felt them so hard. I mean seriously: "Well I’m so far away. Each step that I take’s on my way home. A king’s ransom in dimes, I’d give each night. To see through this payphone.” And: “It’s been raining since you left me. Now I’m drowning in the flood. You see, I’ve always been a fighter. But without you, I give up.” (Always)
Guns’N’Roses – I reckon this song got me through a major bout of depression in my late teens when life felt so BIG and hopeless and insurmountable. “Nothing lasts forever, and we both know hearts can change.” And who could ever forget that film clip??
My friends and I thought we were so edgy and cool listening to the risqué lyrics of the Femmes as young teens. They were really controversial and taboo back then so we’d have to wait til our parents went out to blast them on the boombox (or we’d listen to them on our bright yellow Sony Sports Walkmans).
My best friends and I use to watch this movie over and over and over when we were younger - we’d cry, and eat home made nachos, and ice cream with chopped up candy bars and lollies, and we’d cry some more. “You’re the wind beneath my wings” became our favourite retort to anyone who needed to be brought down a peg or two.
Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze surfing and skydiving. Need I say more? We swoooooooned over this movie as teens. “If you want the ultimate, you’ve got to be willing to pay the ultimate price. It’s not tragic to die doing what you love.”
I think we all coveted the kind of love Sam and Molly shared (there’s a reason the pottery wheel scene is iconic). And Whoopie Goldberg as the reluctant psychic, did she steal the show or what? Her friendship with Sam was serious goals.
Check out DESCENDED here www.ingridjadams.com and calling all bookworms who want to do themselves a favour can buy a copy at any good bookstore, or online here.
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